From the makers of Ek Villain, comes an almost-identical story with the same two out of three actors, except this time we have cringe-worthy dialogues, useless songs and good-for-nothing Tara Sutaria…why, oh, why?!

Rating – 2 / 5 ⭐⭐

Marjaavaan opens with a line about ill-starred lovers, whose fate was doomed the day they met. Well, inspired from that quote, I would like to begin my critique by establishing that this film was doomed the day director Milap Zaveri signed two below-average leads in a stale, shallow romance. While Siddharth Malhotra and Tara Sutaria have both set up an immense fan-following for themselves, that might just be restricted to Instagram. After all, when you hear giggles from around the theatre during intense, emotional scenes – something, somewhere, has gone wrong!

Set in those unseen khoon-kharaba areas of aamchi Mumbai, under the rule of Narayan Anna (Nasser), a mafia don running his own illegal water systems and prostitution ka dhandha, Marjaavaan aimed to be one of those heavily reminiscent films, attempting to take its viewers back to the pure masala cinema days. Raghu (Siddharth Malhotra), an orphan picked up from the dumps by Anna, serves as his right-hand man and runs his businesses smoothly with the help of his boy gang. He soon meets Zoya (Tara Sutaria), a young mute girl passionate about teaching music to kids, and sparks fly between the two. But little they did know, things were only bound to get ugly, especially when Vishnu (Riteish Deshmukh), Anna’s only child, decides to take matters in his own hands.

This Milap Zaveri directorial had a bit too many things gone wrong – to begin with, none of the characters or their relations with one another were outlined distinctly. There was a great deal of grey area, specially between Nasser and Deshmukh’s father-son relationship, which was central to the storyline. Tara-Siddharth’s romance, too, could have been highlighted with more detail and precision to create some more intensity in the post-interval segment. Following a superficial hollow script was probably the film makers’ first mistake, especially when a film has nothing to offer but the script!

Jaan toh voh bhi leta hai, jo tadpata hai…aur phir khud hi marham ban jaata hai”

Marjaavaan was unnecessarily flooded with a shitload of “dialoguebaazi”, which neither impressed the crowd not complemented the theme or emotion originally desired. By the end of it, hearing a dwarf Riteish Deshmukh give self-based jokes such as “jaante ho kamineypan ki height kya hoti hai?”, or Sid Malhotra with his “dobara janam lene se dar jaayega” seemed like some sort of level three torture. It pretty much sounded like 2 hours 15 minutes of incessant weird creepy sher-shayaari and for what…? Regular dialogues would have done the trick just fine, guys.

This film relied heavily on its supporting star cast, who were responsible for letting the audience actually tolerate the film at all. Rakul Preet Singh as Arzoo, a bar dancer and Raghu’s nightly ritual, was a refreshing surprise. Her role was a lot more significant than shown in the trailer and she totally nailed it! Shaad Randhawa as Mazhar was an excellent choice – he did utmost justice to his role as Raghu’s bestie and succeeded in bringing out the emotions that the latter failed to. Riteish Deshmukh took the form of an ultimate villain – so much so that every time he came on screen, a sense of loathe and negativity took over. His dialogue delivery and sarcasm timing was on point! Sid, babe, you still have a long way to go…especially with that stiffness and surface acting.

Lastly, I would like to thank Milap Zaveri for not giving Miss Sutaria any dialogues because let’s face it, given her below-amateur acting skills, words would have only made things more painful for us viewers. #HayeeMainMarjaavaan

“Bohot aayi, gayi movies…magar iss baar, yeh skip karna!”

Got your own reviews and ratings of Marjaavaan? Let me know in the comments section below and follow @thecinesurgeon on Instagram!

Posted by:The Cine Surgeon

Diu Somani, The CineSurgeon, is a student of Veterinary Medicine and Surgery at the Royal Veterinary College in London. Diu has two main loves, animals and Bollywood.